The horrible conversations that happen between me and my friends:
"How would you feel if he died?"
"I'm not even sure I would notice for a while, actually."
"Don't die of cancer- that's fucking lame. If you have terminal cancer, have some self-respect and pull a Hemingway, man. I refuse to ever die of cancer. I would rather the actual cause of death be 'stuck head in oven' or 'provoked and was subsequently eaten by a bear.'"
Also, stupidity happens:
"What's the capital of California?"
"No, that's a person."
"No, you're thinking of the Sasquatch."
"Cool jacket. Did you make that?"
"No. She stole it from a hobo and hung it there as a war trophy."